Mad At Life adn VideoGamez

T-T'

I am mad at life these days, mostly because I wantr to do those same things that ppl do in movies, videogaems, books, anything, where they understand what they did wrong, grow up, help ppl, and i want to do the same.

one problem; do those things even exist?

ive been reading lots of z articles on zi adn zu about childhood, faith, adn how its all mixed in. adn now im still having these little fights with myself-

• Kids are supposed to let go of the tree to grow up; what in teh world do i have to let go of?
• Where is this stupid tree?????????? How do I know the time it is to let go?
  
• How can you have faith if you're never taught it? How can u show faith if there's nothing to believe in?
  
• How can u help people if the circumstances and your true nature don't allow it?
• Do people really think of others as their friends?
• What is the right thing? How do you know its teh right thing?
  
• What is the true face face underneath peoples' masks?
• How is it, to accept change when it never comes?

Stupid Majora's Mask. It gives you so much insight on the world, but tehn when you actually ahve teh information sink in, tehres this huge battle focusing on life.

The Tree of Immortality. A huge playpen. Once you wonder what's outside teh paypen, you decide to venture out and explore waht is beyond it. You let go of teh Tree.

That's all very well in a world made of pixels. What about teh real world? What do we real poeple ahve to let go of? To do waht is so-called growing up???

------------------------15 mins later---------------------------

Ok I'm done ranting. I'm working on my new Blogger template- the main theme is Black Comic. The one right now is Blue Leaves. See? i'm not the only one who is bad at naming things.

Ah...... WW Music is so calming. Especially with teh HQ of Zreo. I've been listening since "Outset Island" adn now I'm on "Graaandma". Dudes, did you know that these Zreo People make too many reduxes of the same song? I mean, there's like, 2 "Outset Island"s adn one Soundscape, which is pretty cool, and there's teh same for "The Great Sea". But there are no reduxes for TP!!!! How could they do it for the most realistic game of teh series adn teh latest console game??? Evilz.....

Well Now I ahve to at least trya dn finish coloring teh header. T-T. Photoshop is actualy working well with me today. :)

Also, my Mom got a new computer and she has Adobe Photoshop CS 4 and she doesn't even use it while I'm teh one whose drawing all th time adn I ahve a crappy CS. My dad offered to install teh 4 but I gues I can wait. After all, I still need to install my enw Bamboo tablet. I eamn, it costs eanr 1000 dollars and I still havnt installed it but I'm still suing my 2 year old F610? Crazy, dontsha think?

Anyways, "Pirate Ship" is playing adn I ened to finish shading teh header.

KATENGERI!!!!!!!!

-chiao

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EDIT

And if you want to read those articles I was talking about, click on these::

http://www.zeldainformer.com/2008/05/the-message-of-majoras-mask.php#more

http://www.zeldauniverse.net/articles/the-missing-link/immortal-childhood/

These two articles is whewre I get my so-called philosophical ideas from. Very good articles, unless you know what teh games are about you won't understand anything, but they can really ger u thinking. Like "let go of teh tree" matephor. But really, in this day and in this world, we don't rally ahve much to let go of..................

------------------------------------------

OMGGPS!!!!!!!

ON TEH GAMESPOT GREATEST HERO CONTEST THINGY LINK IS AGAINST GORDON FREEMAN!!!!!!!!!!

DUDES WE AHVE TO HELP HIM!!!!!!!!!!!

IF GORDON CUD SEMI-TIE WITH SNAKE SURELY LINK WILL AHVE A HARD TIME????

HE NEEDS OUR HELP!!!!!!!

HES ON 52% AGAINST 48%!!!!!

OH NOOOOOOO

ADN IVE ANALYZED TEH VOTES FOR MARIO (CUZ HE WILL AHBVIOSLY BE AGAINST LINK) SO AMRIO HAD 73,000 VOTES IN TEH ALST ROUND WHILE LINK AHD 57,000 VOTES SO MAYBE LINK HAS A CHANCE OF BEATING HIM,

IF PL LOOK AT SOME ITALIAN-AMERICAN PLUMMER DUDE AND THEN LOOK AT EPIC LINK TEHY MUST KNOW THAT LINK IS TEH BETER HERO!!!!!!!!

HEY MUST!!!!!!!!!!!

DUDES, PLEASE. MALO IS BEGGING YOU.

GO ADN VOTE.

http://www.gamespot.com/greatest-video-game-hero/vote/index.html?battle_id=62

PLEASE.

ADN WHILE UR AT IT, VOTE FOR SAMUS. CUZ SAMUS IS LESS POPULAR THAN LINK SO IF SHE (YES, SAMUS IS A SHE) STANDS UP TO LINK SHELL DIE.

Sick and....... Happy????

Yes. So amny of meh fwends may have noticed that I was gone today. Tessa shud of told Alice thatI was sick and Alice shud of told all of u.

So I was bored the whole day so I got an old book from teh shelf in meh room and so that's why I read Eragon throughout teh whole day. Just finished it a couple mins ago. Good book, but since 3 years ahve passed since I last rad it, its too simplistic for me. Really. Talk about lots of LVs. *rolls eyes* I'm sortakindaalmostish thankful to mr.calrk for telling us how to write intersting sentences. Cuz even though I read the book, its fairly interesting, but also fairly boring for those of us who have read interesting philosophical books like Animal Farm adn Lord of the Flies.

I eman, my art teacher Lena has seen teh movie Twilight before reading the boka dn now shes klsitening to it on audiotape and she says that its too pefct, too detailed, nawt enouph emotion, adn that she hates it. And ashe says that its too simple, unlike the movie. Well, lets just say that i told ehr to stop lsitening, grab the book, and jst ignore Twilight adn step onto New Moon. She basically knows what happened in Twilight, so its nawt that big of a prob for her.

AND I finally showed her teh email I sent ehr 2 months ago wiht a ton of videgogame msuic in it. I had her lsitne to teh Okami Main thme and she was all like "its so beautiful!!!" and then i showed her the oficial art of okami adn she was failry amazed. but when i told ehr that i wish i cud express myself the same way as those artists, i wud. then she started ranting on how far ive come into expressing myself and how amazing i already draw. well, i guess not every 7th grader in teh world can cope with drawing flowers for 4 months adn creating something fairly amazing out of it. ewven though i totally hate teh trio now. since "the flower trio" was my first big project in the art class. Its three long panels and each of tehm has a flower on it. and i did it for the living room, cuz its so empty adn teh wall that its gonna hang on is just pure empty. and its a huge wall.

and so now im drawing a fairy, laying down on the roof of somebodies nhouse, enjoying the sunset. so far ive finished teh pic, only now i need to add mucho more contrast. adn i eman alot. its looks like.... dull. more colr, brighter, greater showdos adn more reflection adn harmny within teh pic wud be nice too. but its still my first major project with watorcolor, and its alos my first prfessional pic with a human form. when lena saw my dodle of it, she was all like, "she has finally broken her hand". i think that she meant like ppl ahve broken a horse, i ahve finally broken my hand. actually, nawt really. im still learning. but nawt as fast as i wud like.

ya wanna know the story of how i started the fairy painting? well, i wanted to draw a fairy after my flower trio, and so i got this calendar that lena had with a TON of fairies in it, adn i picked a pose i liked, adn started drawing it. and i toally epicly fairled. i eamn, it was HORRIBLE. and so tehn, being the waittle frusterated person i am, i just started doodling, adn came out teh sunset fairy. ooh. i think ill call ehr that from now on.

adn so eyah. every time i move i end up couhping. adn its so freakin annoying. i eamn really.

and so eayh. *couph* dah epic failness *couphcouph*

IM NAWT EVEN MOVING!!!!!!!!!!!! my body wants to kil me. T-T. but now i have an excuse from sitting out of PE tomorrow *does teh cali happy dance*

oooooooooooh im so havin fun listneing to twilight "teh score" msuyic rite now. epic electric guitar. *does horrible air guitar* i think illo stick to air-violin....... *hehe*

so bai.

*cough*

New art Problems

Yeah I've been having problems with art. I havn't been having much fun lately while I'm drawing. I still love to draw, but something's just not right. I draw less sophisticated than usual. I don't have much inspiration. More like NONITO!! I look into music. I listen to songs that make me feel happy. All that came out of it was a feeling of hollowness created by anticipation for a new Wii Zelda and a page full of Zelda doodles. But on that page was the best horse I ahve EVER drawn. And I'm pretty proud of it. Too bad when I try and draw it again, it turns out horrible. I try and compose new things on piano. i succeded. but the feeling was short lived. I feel so... emotion drained. Like thers a bundle of Potential Energy inside me but I can't get it out but the bonds b/w the electons don't seem to be working. Even my art class isn't as great as I thought it could be. There was a time in my life when I adored my art class, b/c it was the brightest thing in my life at the time. I ws the outcast of 5th grade, meddling with everyone, acting weird, trying to obtain social status, but at the same time hating every second of the year. Art class carried away all my worries. I came in there skipping. I drew my heart out. I wish that feeling stretched out longer. Then came Christmas a few years ago. I got my tablet. I loved it. back then I was attached to Neopets by teh hip; I couldn't stay away from Neopets too long. But that's also when I found out about Youtube and AlliKatNya and animating and Warrior Cats. I refuised to get the WOTF (Warriors of the Forest) theme songs out of my ehad. I remembered every frame, every pan and zoom of the series. I couldn't help thinkning that I might be as famous as AlliKat. That's when I tried aminating. If you want to see my feeble attempt, go on my YT and look at Prologue part 1. I hate it. The absolute most dullest, horrible, angry video I ave ever made. At teh time when I actually aimated something (bluestar walking down the rock) I showed it to my mom. She was amazed. I felt proud.

Now back to this time. I draw something, like a cat reaching in to catch a leaf. Fail. The cat looks like its floating in space. No muscles, no frame, no personality. That;s when I really started drawing like a maniac. I can't focus on a detial. I have to scribble it out so that no one can understnad what is in there but me. I have to research all the muscles of the animal, which, most of the time doesn't work well. And all of you who ahve seen me draw a face have seen me doing the face and not noticing it. It helps. I imagine the muscles, i feel what teh viewer has to feel when theyre looking at a drawing. Call me crazy, but thats what I do. Nothing i can do about it.

Well, and there's the problem with the tablet. If my darn tablet was working I'd be sitting around on Photoshop doodling away. But NOOOOOOOOOOOO. It decided to quit on me. It works, but really screwey. I mean, When I press a button on the side, it decided to activate the otehr one. And when I drag it across the screen, it does it in little jumps, always landing int eh wrong place. And there is the Photoshop screw. Whenever it's working "ok" (yeah right. not this pen) I try adn use Photoshop adn it decides that I don't need any pressure! cuz normally wehnever I press harder on PS, it comes outharder. When I press lightly, all you see is a little line. And now it decides that I don't need the pressure that makes m y works look like pwnage. Dang you G-pen! And the worst part is that I fixed it a couple months ago AND added a new pen tip. Well, my dad fixed it. But I helped. So yeah. And now my dad is all fed up with work and he's the only one who knows about the G-pen so I'm guessing I have to wait until his and Mom's workload lessens.

And so goes my Art Problems. Be scared. And please comment and tell me what you think I should do with this problem. I think it all comes down to teh tablet.