What is Fair

These days in my life, and in many others, I think, I am exposed to the theme of unfairness and destiny, and its role in the term 'fairness'.

I have conversations with a great person at lunch. We had this great relationship in 7th grade (ful of squabbles and kind words), and come 8th, tension suddenly rose amongst us. I dont know what happened, but I was thinking about severing ties with this person and decided to do it. But luckily, things didnt go to plan. We txted one night. And she started praising me for being such a good friend. "Thanks for being right by me, Darya. Thank you so much." "Why though? I havnt done anything to deserve it." "You help, adn Im thankful. Cuz thats what best friends are for." I lied on my true feelings and ran into teh abthroom in tears. I was planning on severing our relashionship the next day.

The next day at lunch, I decided to try adn carry out my plan. I knew it wouldnt work: yesterdays txt conversation proved that. But we talked. Both of us (or ata least me) got red-faced, and we hugged adn screamed and laughed and hugged and screamed (when we got too close to teh hand-dryer and it went VROOOOMMM and it was ushc a surprise that we flew back away in shock). And we grew closer. And I wondered why that was fair. That I got such a great friend when Ive been such an iclky, unfaithful one in return. Is that fair? Ive begun to thing no.

We talked for the rest of the lunch period and the lunch period after that. I shared some of my deepst secrets, some of which are too dreadful to post online. These secrest remain only in my family adn that one friend (wait - two. But that other one is faraway.,...). She told me of her crush who was having a truly difficult timne, after hearing what troubles I was going through. her crush, named Tim in purposes of this psot, had his father on his deathbed. My friend couldnt imagine the pain hes going through at this moment, and she said that she realized how unfair it was, looking at her sheltered, stable life, free of worries (at that point - but that changed), adn the hidden life that her friends closest to her were trying to hide. She said she couldnt imagine what we were going through, being in the trouble we were. maybe that day she unbderstood why I unconditionally refused to wander away from my faithful belief of The Secret. I just need something real, or somehwat real, spomething stable, something that will never leave to believe in in these chaotic times.

She wondered why it is fair: That these amazing people have such problems (shah - she called me amazing!) while she, an idiot, leads the life of luxury. She wondered whether there was a role that destiny played in this. I say probobly yes.

I dont remmber how I got to this, but she (my friend) and a young, small, loving, philosophic bumblebee were talking one day at lunch, and somehow got onto teh path of destiny, or something of the like. I overheard their conversation adn replied to the questions they asked to each other. I answered something, I dont remmber what, and they countered that. "What is something?" I kept on answering their questions until the question was this: "Why do we need balance?" "Because you couldnt survive without it." They laughed and said I got that from Physics. To be honest, I was thinking on YinYan.

Today my brother had a fight with my dad. I dont know what happened, but dad is refusing to aknosledge that his son is in trouble and that he needs to negotiate a way out with his only son. At this moment, my brother is weeping in front of the TV, watching The O'Reilly Show, while dad is eating. When I called my rbother for diner, he said, "Id rather starve to death than have a father who doent trust me."

Is that fair? Yes, both my dad and my brother have very strong opinions and personalities, and unfortunatly, they point in different directions. I admire btoh of them for the stubborn, rebelious streak, that ned to win every argument. But when paired against each other, I just feel the need to vent my feelings on a blog post. Is it fair? That such wonderous two, great people, cant simply get along?

Now, my mom just wlked in and asked me to go to sleep. I overslept today and didnt get my english, nor 2 math homeworks done. Good night folks. Ponder.

Good night.
Bone nuit.
Spakoinoi Nochi.

Darya The Calzinator.